apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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