I don't usually arrange sex via text message
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
