Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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