The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Are we still banned from the library?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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