Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
