I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
