you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
