Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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