Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
