I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Dick very happy bro
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
