how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Randomize
