just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
