two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
