I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
