Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
