so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
