i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
