We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
