Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Can I color on your dick again?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
