I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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