The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize