who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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