i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
