I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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