Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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