Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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