Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
