Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
