Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Randomize
