I wish I could teleport
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
