Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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