you win again, gameday.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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