I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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