You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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