Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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