their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
