Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
The police scanner is talking about you again....
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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