If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
