Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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