But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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