every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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