Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
