Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
