just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
