Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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