we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
worst night to have a conscience
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
