So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
