He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
