All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I just want nice things and good sex
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
