What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
